20 days into my 40 day journey. It has been a crazy hard good journey so far. Some of the last 20 days have been easy, other parts of it have had me kicking and screaming my way through.
If you know me you know that I try really hard to take care of myself. However, I have one major addiction…..POTATO CHIPS!! Seriously the salty fried goodness makes me happy. They are my go to snack or should I say they were. Yes, that’s right! I have not had a potato chip in 20 days! God asked me to let them go. It helped that I had a stomach bug right before and the thought of grease made me queasy. But seriously you guys no potato chips. I know what you might be thinking. Well sure you haven’t had those chips but I bet you have had tortilla chips. Nope! I can’t have corn so those are out too. Now I need to be transparent here. I have had black bean tortilla chips……let’s just say I throw a few on my salad if I need a crunch but that’s it. Trust me when I say that I could walk away from those.
God truly has been digging into my heart when it comes to my eating. Why I am eating? Is it because I really am hungry or because I am stressed or upset. He has been having me clean up my food. He just asked me to give up sugar this week. I am not a sweets person but I love my dark chocolate. Yesterday the dark chocolate chips went into the garbage! Gasp! Rather than running to the chocolate to deal with my stress and sadness, I am going to take it to God instead. I will keep you posted on how this goes. Again, transparency, I ate a pocket coffee today. Ok I ate two! But grace lots of grace!
Shopping…….yes I like to shop. We have a budget that we really try and stick to. We are trying to get debt free so living by our budget is important to us. However, God put me on a spending freeze in January unless it was a necessity. Wow!! Just wow! I had no idea that I was spending more that we had budgeted. It was always just smaller purchases but they added up. Not spending last month was a big eye opener. It was another way I was stuffing my feelings. Trying to heal myself through things. FYI it wasn’t working. It was always just a temporary good feeling followed by remorse.
Social Media…..Ugh! Need I say more. I am still working on this one. I know I spend to much time on it. I have been doing better and really when I am not on it I feel better. The comparison trap eases.
So here’s the thing. God is sowing me so many things through this 40 days. It is not easy but I am drawing closer to him. Allowing him to get into the painful places in my heart. To clean it out so that I can run my race! Stay tuned…..20 more days to go! Not only will 20 days bring the close to this 40 day journey that God has me on, it will also signal the start of the Disney Princess Half Marathon weekend where I will be running the 5K and the 10K with an amazing team. So here is to running the races that God has set before us!
Blessings,
Michelle